Ask the Expert: Talking About Sex Therapy with Baltimore Magazine
I was recently honored to be featured in Baltimore Magazine "Ask the Expert" column to share insights on a topic that is deeply personal yet often misunderstood: sex therapy. Relationships naturally have their ups and downs, and that includes intimacy. Whether it’s due to being too busy, distracted, or affected by stressors outside the bedroom, it’s common for intimacy to take a backseat.
In the interview, I spoke candidly about why individuals and couples might seek sex therapy, the many benefits it can offer, and how it helps people navigate challenges in their relationships. We also explored ways to break down the stigma surrounding sex therapy, opening the door to healthier conversations about intimacy and connection.
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Baltimore Magazine | All of Your Burning Questions About Sex Therapy Answered
BM: What is sex therapy?
SS: Sex therapy is a form of talk therapy aimed at addressing sexual difficulties and enhancing sexual health and well-being. It's important because first and foremost we are all sexual beings. I do believe that people tend to get hyper-focused on the mechanics of sex, when a lot of times our sexual desire is impacted by our mental health.
Sex therapy shines a light in spaces we sometimes don't want to look at because it's uncomfortable, but there are so many sexual health challenges that would no longer be challenges if people talked about sex and their experiences more.
BM: Who Can Benefit?
SS: It can be very beneficial for anyone, no matter age, gender, or sexual orientation. The big thing is providing a safe and confidential space to explore and resolve issues that are holding you back from enjoying a healthy sex life. You can choose whether to attend therapy by yourself or as a couple with your partner.
We tend to see issues pertaining to mismatched libidos, anxiety, performance issues, aging, and intimacy problems. We also work with a lot of premarital couples, which is great to see. Starting a marriage off with open communication about sexual desires and boundaries is very promising.
BM: What can you expect when trying sex therapy?
SS: Typically, we start with a screener phone call. Then, the first appointment can be anywhere from 1 to 3 hours long depending on the needs of the patient or patients. We also tell people to clear their schedules for that day, and to bring in a list of any medications they are on.
You'll usually leave with some type of "homework" for the next session, like communication exercises, mindfulness techniques, reading articles, and watching educational videos that pertain to sexual health.
BM: What is the stigma around sex therapy?
SS: I definitely think that we're in a cultural shift right now; we are moving toward more affirming sex positivity. But I'm sure some people still immediately think it's just focused on how to have sex and that's not necessarily true. I think what people don't realize is that if you are talking about mental health, you are talking about sexual health. There is not one without the other.
BM: What do you need to prepare for sex therapy?
SS:
A Brave Face: Therapists create a safe and supportive space for discussing challenging topics.
A Prepared List: Bring questions to ensure you cover all concerns during your session.
Follow Through: Stay open-minded and actively engage in at-home techniques provided by your therapist.
In the end, sex therapy is about more than just addressing challenges in the bedroom. It’s about fostering deeper connection, understanding, and well-being in our lives. By creating a safe and supportive space, it allows individuals and couples to explore the often-overlooked link between mental and sexual health, helping to break down barriers and strengthen relationships.
While it may feel intimidating to start, approaching therapy with an open mind and a willingness to explore these personal topics can lead to profound growth and healing. As we continue to move toward a more affirming and sex-positive culture, embracing conversations about intimacy and connection can pave the way for healthier, more fulfilling relationships.