When was the last time you actually rested? Not just, “I didn't go to work today,” or, “I spent three hours scrolling on my phone,” but really rested. I think a lot of us have forgotten what that even looks like.
We live in a world that constantly asks us to do more. Work more, accomplish more, answer the email, clean the house, respond to the text, make the appointment, finish the assignment, run the errands, and somehow still have enough energy left over to be present for the people we care about. When we finally get a moment where nobody is asking anything from us, we often fill it with something else. We scroll, binge-watch, catch up on things, worry about tomorrow, or make a mental list of everything we should be doing instead.
Technically, we're not working. But are we actually resting?
I don't think rest has to mean sitting completely still with an empty to-do list. In fact, I think sometimes we get so caught up in the idea of “rest” that we accidentally turn it into another thing we're supposed to be good at. Creation is not the enemy of relaxation, though sometimes the mode of creating can be.
There is something different about intentionally making something simply because you enjoy the experience of making it. Maybe you're painting, cooking, gardening, crafting, rearranging your space, baking, playing music, or putting together a meal that took absolutely no culinary skill but somehow still feels like an accomplishment. Maybe what you created is a beautiful piece of art. Maybe it's a scrapbook. Maybe it's a cozy corner in your home. Or maybe it's a Hot Pocket. And honestly? That counts too.
There can be something deeply satisfying about feeling your hands create something and then getting to experience the result. You took something that didn't exist five minutes ago and made it exist. You participated in the process. You got to choose something, do something, and experience the little satisfaction that comes with seeing it through. That's not necessarily productivity. Sometimes, that's play. Sometimes, that's creativity. Sometimes, that's rest.
The difference is intentionality. Are you making the Hot Pocket because you genuinely want a Hot Pocket and the experience sounds comforting? Or are you standing in the kitchen trying to accomplish one more thing while mentally running through everything else you haven't done today? The activity itself isn't always what determines whether something is restorative. How we are engaging with it matters, too.
Sometimes We're Resting. Sometimes We're Numbing.
Here's where it gets a little uncomfortable. Sometimes what we call rest is actually avoidance. We might scroll because we're overwhelmed, sleep because we don't want to think, or stay busy because slowing down would give our feelings enough room to catch up with us. And sometimes we're doing absolutely nothing because our bodies and brains are genuinely exhausted.
Those things can look remarkably similar from the outside, which is why I don't think the answer is to shame ourselves for how we spend our downtime. Instead, it can be helpful to get curious. How do I feel after this? Do I feel more settled, connected, energized, or like myself? Or do I feel just as overwhelmed as I did before, only now I've lost two hours to my phone and somehow feel guilty about that, too? There isn't always a simple answer, and sometimes what we need changes from day to day. But noticing the difference can be an important first step.
You Don't Have to Earn Rest
This might be the part we need to hear the most: you do not have to finish everything before you're allowed to rest. There will always be another email, another load of laundry, another assignment, another appointment, and another thing on the to-do list. If rest only happens once everything is finished, you may never get to rest.
Rest isn't a reward for being productive enough. It's part of being human.
Sometimes the most intentional thing you can do is recognize that you've reached your limit before your body has to force you to stop. Sometimes that means sleeping. Sometimes it means getting outside. Sometimes it means sitting quietly. Sometimes it means making something with your hands. Sometimes it means making yourself a Hot Pocket and enjoying the experience of it.
The next time you have a little space in your day, instead of immediately asking yourself, “What should I do?” try asking, “What do I need?” Maybe the answer is rest. Maybe it's movement, connection, quiet, creativity, or something that makes you feel a little more like yourself. The goal isn't to find the perfect way to relax. It's to become more intentional about noticing what actually helps you feel restored.
Because sometimes rest looks like doing nothing.
And sometimes rest looks like making something.
You don't have to be “productive” to deserve a pause.
By Izzy Padgett – Graduate Student Intern